Gratitude, the Italian Riviera and Yvette

I've driven thousands of miles across Europe in my travels.  This week, I drove along the Italian Riviera and it was one of my all-time favorite drives.

In a lot of places I've driven in the last 2 months, the radio is full of static and the near-constant tunnels make the radio useless. Without radio to distract me, I spend a lot of time thinking. It's nice to be completely free for the first time in my adult life. I don't have a job to worry about... no house, bills, or any traditional life stressors to weigh on my mind. It's been wonderful to be away from TV, the news, my iPhone, iPad and laptop.  I've been alone with my thoughts for a big portion of this trip and that had been wonderful.

On Monday afternoon, I dropped my parents at the Nice airport and drove up the Italian Riviera towards San Remo.  It was a gorgeous, sunny day...the water a beautiful shade of blue, the sky dotted with perfect, puffy white clouds.  I was looking around at all the beauty of the Italian Riviera, the sweeping vistas, the mountains, the villages and I was overcome by the beauty. I found myself wanting everyone in the world to see this amazing place.

I started thinking about all the people who will never see this place. And tears were suddenly streaming down my cheeks. I thought of factory workers, teachers who spend their money on school supplies, single mothers and hardworking parents with tight budgets for whom travel (let alone international travel) is cost prohibitive. I started thinking about all the people around the world who would never have the money to travel the way I have, or would never be able to take the time off work to do so. And then I thought of all the people in history who had lived their entire lives and died without ever seeing the beauty that I was seeing.

My grandma and grandpa for example, died without ever seeing that view. As I drove, that made me so inexplicably sad.  My grandpa worked his entire life and never visited Europe, let alone Italy or the Riviera!  One of my moms closest friends is Italian and she's never seen that view.  I want nothing more than to bring her here... to show her this place.  The stretch of land between Nice, France and San Remo Italy is perhaps the most gorgeous place on the face of this earth.

As I drove along, I felt the most overwhelming sense of sadness and gratitude. Perhaps for the first time on this 13 week trip, I truly, fully realized the gravity of what I’m doing. Very few people in the world are ever able to do something like this.  I was suddenly keenly aware of how lucky I am. And I felt tiny, small and insignificant in the grand scheme of the universe.  I felt unworthy somehow. I just couldn't believe that I get to do this...to see this place...to take this trip.  Me!  I was full of joy.

As I drove, I thought about that all of us have lives that include sorrow and joy. My sister, for example, would love to travel as I've been able to.  But, along with that sorrow, she has the incredible joy of her marriage and their large family of 6 children!  And while I have the wonderful opportunity to travel, the freedom I enjoy is because I am single and don't have a family of my own. That carries with it some inherent sorrow. Neither life is right or wrong, better or worse. They're just different.  I know my sister wants me to find a great love of my own, get married and have children. And I want her to have the ability to see the world as I've been able to.

She and I work very hard to simply understand that we have different joys and sorrows in our lives. (Sometimes we're successful, sometimes not so much!) But, we try to share the joys and sorrows with each other, understanding that we may never truly identify with the peaks and valleys in each others lives.  But trying is all that matters.

I spent that afternoon driving and thinking, finding clarity in dark corners of my mind I normally avoid by grabbing my iPhone or singing along to Tom Petty on the radio.

That's what the italian Riviera was for me. A place so beautiful, a moment so perfect that I was completely overcome by it.  My heart was so full of love and gratitude, I just wanted to share it with everyone.

You'll notice this post has no photos. That's intentional.  No image would ever capture what I saw that day driving up the coast.  But...try to imagine it.  Soft blue sky, puffy clouds, deep blue water, gorgeous towns spilling down the craggy cliffs towards the Mediterranean.  Warm air blowing in the car windows and an empty road stretching out before you.

Close your eyes and imagine a place that puts you back in touch with your soul.

Solo Pet Peeves

Human beings are terrified of being alone.

I find it very interesting.  People are constantly trying to escape being alone.  We surround ourselves with people- family, friends, husband, wives, children, crowds, bigger crowds, strangers.  Anything to keep from being (gasp!) alone. I mean, I get it. If given the choice, you'd rather go to dinner with your husband/wife/kids/ boyfriend/ girlfriend/BFF than to be alone.  I feel the same way sometimes.  But, what if you want to see an art exhibit and no one is available to go with you? Will you skip it? Would you go hungry instead of having a sandwich solo? If so....why?

I'm single and don't have children, so spend a decent amount of time alone. Generally speaking, I'm perfectly okay with that. It seems to freak the shit out of everyone else, though. I'm an extrovert, to be sure. I love being around others, talking, sharing, socializing. But, I also like to be alone to recharge my batteries. I'll go to the movies or a museum alone. And of course, those of you who read my blog regularly know that I'm currently traveling throughout Europe for 3.5 months alone.

A part of me relishes doing things alone. When I'm alone, I can circle the parking lot 5 times waiting for the perfect parking spot to open up without judgement or park at the furthest spot to get some extra steps in my pedometer. I don't have to compromise and go to the restaurant I don't really like, but my friend/mom/boyfriend/cousin/coworker likes.  I linger or dash when I want. I can see the movie I want to see and sit in the exact seat I want, no hushed negotiations in the darkened theater aisle about seating. Ahhh, it's the blissful freedom of no compromises!

I'm also comfortable eating in a restaurant alone, which I know makes some people super uncomfortable. I have a busy brain always thinking of a dozen things, so it's almost impossible to get bored.  But I can also shut it off and relax, read, or people watch happily.

But despite my comfort at being alone, I on this trip, I've realized I have a few pet peeves and I've got to vent!

Pet Peeve #1 - "Only one?"
If I walk into a restaurant alone and say confidently with a smile "I'd like a table for dinner, please" the correct response is "Yes, ma'am, right this way." (or some derivation thereof).

The INCORRECT responses include:
"Just you?"
"A table for one?"
"Dining alone tonight, ma'am?"
"Will someone else be joining you?"

But above all of them, my LEAST favorite response is: "Only one?"

Only.
One.

Only one? Nothing like adding the word "only" to instantly assign value and importance to the quantity of people sitting at a table. Embedded in that sentence is judgement and value: more is better.  Two is appropriate. Two is expected. Three or four is great and more than that is a party!  But one? Can it be true? Can one person want to sit at a table and eat food?  Make no mistake.  "Only one?" is a value statement. Only signifies lacking, too few, not enough. Only one, frankly, is an asshole thing to say.

Pet Peeve #2 - Sad glances

There are few things more annoying than Little Miss Sad Glances.  I am enjoying a nice meal and a glass of wine and looking around when I spot her.  There's always (at least) one woman nearby nervously checking me out every 30 seconds.  My very existence makes her so uncomfortable it actually disturbs her meal.   Sometimes she even points me out to her companion, who will also look over. Interestingly, if it's a man, he usually smiles and has a look in his face that says "cool." But, if it's a woman, she also gives me sad glances.   I'm not going to burst into flames, lady. I'm just gonna eat this sandwich and then resume my fabulous life....mmmkay? Thanks.

Pet Peeve #3 "You're my hero/so brave / I could never!"

Ahhhh, this one is the worst!  I'm sitting in an awesome restaurant in Budapest, enjoying a glass of wine and a nice meal and two 20-something girls stop by and say "we just think you're SO brave to sit here and eat alone!"  Her friend nods emphatically and says with a big smile,  "SO, SO brave!"  Derivations of this include the overly sympathetic smile and the random stop at my table to pay me a compliment.  It's usually something like "I think it's awesome you'll go out to eat alone!" or "You're so brave!" with a big, reassuring smile. Sometimes they go a little further and remind me of why they don't do the same thing.  "I could never!" or "I just don't think I could do that, I'd be too self-conscious!" or something along those lines.

The intent is to praise me, to make me feel better and to show me that they're so impressed. (SO, SO brave!) You're impressed I'm eating spaghetti?  Well then you should see what I can do to a steak and baked potato! I'm eating food, like I've done successfully for about 31 years now.  I don't need praise...now please get away from my table.

*******

I've got some dark news for you, folks. We all come in this world alone and we all leave it the same way. If you can't eat a sandwich alone without getting twitchy, you might want to reexamine some things.

I challenge you all to do 2 things: 
1. Don't ever do anything I outlined above.  It's rude.  It's insensitive. You are projecting your uncomfortable shit onto the solo diner / movie watcher / museum goer.  They're alone. They are comfortable. They rock. Move on with your day.

2.  Try doing something alone! Actually, try 3 things. Because it takes some getting used to. But you'll find your solo groove, I promise!

• First, try a solo movie. That's super easy. It's dark, you have popcorn to munch on and you're not supposed to talk during the movie anyway.  Go, enjoy the movie, then resume your life emboldened by your solo outing!

• Next, try going to a museum or art gallery by yourself. Linger when you want, race through a room full of art you hate, do whatever you want! Reassure yourself (as needed) by reminding yourself that no one knows if your husband/friend is just in the next room or at the last painting.

• And then one day, take a deep breath and go out to eat alone. Order a cocktail and your favorite meal. 
• Try not to have your phone or iPad in your hand, getting on Facebook...because that's really avoiding being alone. Just sit back, enjoy your drink, enjoy your meal, look around and smile!
• If that's too much... go ahead and take a book, crossword puzzle or your Kindle and get lost in a good story. Before you know it, you might just look forward to solo meals where you can recharge in peace.

Life is too short to miss out on things because you’re scared of being alone. Take a deep breath, put a smile on your face and get out there!

And remember... I think you are SO, SO BRAVE!

Antibes and Cannes

This post is part of 4 posts on Nice, Monaco, Carnavale and Antibes and Cannes. 

• All about Nice, France. Check it out...! 
• If you want to read about Carnavale and see my insane pictures... Check it out...! 
• My tiny country profile of Monaco is here: Check it out...!
• Antibes and Cannes is where I fell in love with yachts. Read all about it, below.

                                                         ************

On Monday, we drove down the coast to Antibes and Cannes before I dropped my parents off at the airport in Nice for their return flight to Vicenza.

In Antibes, we parked the car and decided to walk around.  

As we strolled along the streets, we came across a creperie and decided to duck inside for a quick bite.  I got a ham and cheese crepe and it was enormous and delicious! Actually, it was something other than a crepe... but I can't remember the name.  The guy explained crepes are usually filled with sweet filling.

And we ran into the cutest puppy in the world... a Cavalier King Charles spaniel.

And then we found the marina.  I've never seen so many yachts in one place. They ranged in size from large to truly enormous.

I really liked the ones that were real wood...

But, I'd take this one, too!

I think part of the fun of owning a boat would be naming her. I liked this one, named Zoe.

This one was from New York. How the heck did they get it from New York over? This little boat can't go that far, right? Did they ship it?  Is shipping a ship a thing?

And even a few yachts for sale. I fell in love with this one.  If anyone wants to buy it for me, just let me know!

After Antibes, we drove further down the coast to Cannes, home of the famous Cannes Film Festival. Sadly, we were running out of time before my parents had to be at the airport, so we only had time for a quick stop at a public beach.  I would have liked to explore the town, see the famous locations and sights. I guess I'll just have to go back!

From what I saw, Cannes is a beautiful town. Here's a few photos from the beach:

My dad...

And me...!

The French Riviera was absolutely awesome...even in February!

Tiny country: MONACO!

This is part of 4 posts on Nice, Monaco, Carnavale and Antibes and Cannes.

• All about Nice, France. Check it out...! 
• If you want to read about Carnavale... Check it out...! 
• My tiny country profile of Monaco...read below!
• Antibes and Cannes is where I fell in love with yachts. Check it out... !

************

About 45 minutes up the coast from Nice is the 2nd smallest country in the world...the Principality of Monaco.

Now, if you're a regular reader of my blog, you'll know I'm planning to visit 4 tiny countries on this trip: Liechtenstein, San Marino, Monaco and Vatican City.  I love learning about their tiny rules, regulations and histories!

A few fun facts about Monaco:

• home to only 35,000 people but 125 nationalities
• 0% unemployment and 0% income tax
• citizens of Monaco are NOT allowed to gamble or visit the casinos, including the famed Monte Carlo
• Monaco has a small military of about 100 people, but no navy or air force
• France is responsible for defending the country if attacked by another nation
• Monaco has a massive police force, with just 500 police officers for 33,000 people.  
• the Monaco Grand Prix has been held since 1929. 
• It takes 6 weeks to set up the circuit and 3 weeks to take it down 
• the flag is identical to the Indonesian flag

Sunday afternoon, we drove from Nice up the coast to visit the tiny country. It was a cloudy day but warm and the drive was nice. The water was beautiful and I just wanted to drive all day.  

We arrived and parked in the marina area...not realizing how far we were from the Monte Carlo, which you can allllmost make out high on the hill behind us.

The marina area was very pretty... lots of cafes and restaurants spilling out onto the sidewalks and great views of the country/city built into the hill.

And of course, what's a marina without some boats?

But this is Monaco... so the boats put all other boats to shame. There are yachts...

And then there are YACHTS....(look at the very top of the photo...)

After checking out the yachts, we started the trek up the hill. It was surprisingly hard to find the Monte Carlo casino, but that was probably just because we came up the hill in a strange way. But it made for some great views!

We saw this plaque dedicated to Princess Grace of Monaco.  Of course, we Americans know her as Grace Kelly, the actress who met Prince Ranier III of Monaco and married him in 1956.  Isn't that every little girls dreams, to marry a prince? Sadly, she died at the age of 52 when she accidentally drove her car off a cliff near Monaco.  It was nice to see this tribute to her.

 Walking around in Monaco, you realize quickly there is no shortage of opulence, wealth and gorgeous architecture!

Apparently, Monegasques appreciate the finer things in life.

French...

 And Italian...

Finally, this sign let us know we were on the right track.

In my head, I could almost hear the James Bond theme song starting up.  (James Bond visits the famous Monte Carlo casino in at least 2 Bond movies... Never Say Never Again and Golden Eye. I think there might be a third, but it escapes me at the moment!)

And then, I was busy photographing this gorgeous building....

I didn't realize that behind me, we'd finally found the world famous Monte Carlo casino...!

 Here's a better view... (i.e. a photo I didn't take!)

The casino has a strict dress code, does not permit smoking, doesn't allow residents of Monaco to enter, and of course, you must be 18 years old. It also doesn't open until 2 on Sunday, which we didn't realize.  We decided to have lunch at the Cafe de Paris right next door. It has a huge patio with extraordinary views of the casino and courtyard, where all the fancy cars are parked. 

It was at the Cafe de Paris that I ate the most expensive cheeseburger and fries of my life.  I paid  27€, or about $37.50.  And it wasn't cooked enough. I'd asked for med-well. It came med-rare. When he came back to the table 30-ish minutes later, the waiter was very snooty and seemed annoyed when I only ate half of my $37.50 burger.  He asked if there was a problem and I admitted it wasn't cooked to my liking.  He seemed hostile the rest of the meal, as though I'd done something to offend him. $37.50 gets you lots of French attitude.

Oh, but there are two things more worth remembering than the snotty French waiter.  

1. The two women lunching next to us ordered RAW hamburger patties with french fries.  My mom, dad and I almost died! In my entire life, I've never seen anything like that. Just a raw ball of meat on a plate. They are it with a fork and acted like it was delicious. Yuck!

2.  I'm 98% certain Ralph Lauren was sitting at the table behind us. He was tall, white hair, dressed impeccably and wearing a pair of loafers that cost more than my first car. Probably more than all of my cars.  

After lunch we headed over to the casino. The interior was gorgeous! 

                                        

The bathroom had way too many mirrors - a girl could get lost in those mirrors.

The bar was made of these draped, gorgeous crystals.

Mom and I explored every inch, including this empty staircase to nowhere. Photo op!

We gambled a bit, and my mom was the big winner. She pocketed almost 9€ you guys!

But perhaps my favorite part of the Monte Carlo was the area outside, where all of the expensive cars were parked.  I've never seen so many expensive cars all in one area.  Lamborghini's, Ferraris, Maserati,  Mercedes Benz and Rolls Royce, all lined up one after the other.

My mom looks so adorable next to this Rolls Royce...

But, the only way to tell the residents from all the others is this, the coveted Principality of Monaco license plate.

After looking (drooling) at the cars for awhile, the afternoon was winding down and it was time to return to Nice. The sun was starting to set as we walked down the hill to the marino where I parked the car. We walked slowly, looking at the architecture, the yachts, the beautiful, blue water that stretched out into the horizon forever. We looked in shop windows, pointed to things of interest, and tried to absorb every sight, sound and smell. We wandered past one shop window displaying Grand Prix trophies and winner photos.

I think we all did our best to walk as slowly as possible.  Because really, I doubt anyone ever wants to leave Monaco...