Please, pass the tissues.

If you're not familiar with my adventures in restoration, read the post HERE before you continue. 
See the finished product...my fully renovated house HERE.

One week from today, I'll sit at a closing table and sign my dream home over to complete strangers.

On the horizon is adventure beyond my wildest dreams.  For the next 3 months, I'll be living in Italy, traveling through Europe and finishing with 2 weeks in France. I am over-the-moon excited for this trip. When I return, I'm moving back to my home state of Michigan! After 14 years away, it'll be amazing to live near my family and friends again. Lunch with my sister! Antiquing with my mom! Activities with my nieces and nephews! I cannot wait.

I am very excited for the next chapter of my life to begin.
And I am also so sad, I can barely breathe.
                               
The sadness crept in this week as I started packing up my house. This is the end of a really big chapter in my life. I left Michigan at the age of 21, spent 3 years in Los Angeles and the last 11 years here in Atlanta. This will be my 3rd cross-country move and let me tell you...it's always hard.

In a lot of ways, I grew up in Atlanta. It's the place I've spent the majority of my adult life, where my friendships have developed, where my career has grown and where I've had 1,000 amazing experiences.

It's where I learned improv and did my first Zip!Zap!Zop!  It's where I first sang on stage, performed spoken word poetry, ran my first mile and completed my first triathlon.  It's where I have tried new things, failed, succeeded, grown and learned. It's also where I purchased, renovated and sold my first two homes, which has turned into a passion for me.  I love my life in Atlanta. This house, this neighborhood, this city feels more like home to me than any place on Earth.

I've told a few friends how I feel and the replies have been "But Michigan will be so great!" or "Just think about your trip to Italy! It's a grand adventure."  It's almost as if the wonderful events on the horizon mean I can't also be sad that this chapter of my life is coming to a close.

I'm sad. And that doesn't mean I'm making the wrong choice. It just means I'm sad. Change is hard. Leaving people you love is difficult. Moving cross country is stressful.  Selling the home you imagined spending your life in...is heartbreaking.

The last few days have consisted of mostly packing and crying. Last night, I found myself on my kitchen floor sobbing amidst boxes and bubble wrap.  Thank God for my best friend, Erin, or I might still be there on the floor.

So, for now, please don't tell me how great Michigan is (it is!). Please don't remind me that Italy will be amazing (it will!) or that I should be excited for the adventures that lay ahead of me (I am!).

Just hold my hand and try to understand.
This was an exceptional chapter in my life.
And please, pass me the tissues.